Days passess

Without noticing, it's end of week 5. I'm still feeling lost. Where has all the optimistic me gone to? Have I changed or have I turn mature and had faced the reality. Does reality means worries and problem. It seems that I'm not quite enjoying the life that I'm suppose to. Is it that it's time for me to put down my books and go be a white collar instead?

Everything doesn't seems to work the way I want it to. I wish the time will go slower. Let me be able to adapt myself to the situation and more time to clear my mind off whatever that is on my mind. Even when I tried not to think about anything, my mind just keep moving. It won't stop. makes me dizzy and headache.

It's either the medication that I"m taking that is having the effect on me, or it's just me who ain't able to stay in my bed longer during weekends. Had alot to read and do. And yet couldn't make myself to sit in front of my textbook and my notes. Why have I turn into such lazybum. Why I'm so not motivated. Why i'm so stupid. Why am I not able to fit in and why I'm not able to understand the textbook and notes......